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Journalista. TV addict. Hip-hop head. Shoe enthusiast. Animal lover. Writer. Blogger. Coffee-holic. Twit. Alias: Mommy. #binders

546 Following   567 Followers   831 Tweets

Join Twitter 1/20/09

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Both kids up since 5:30. Am currently pouring coffee into my eyeballs and refereeing an argument over pan lids. Send help.
2/28
2015
For less than $20, you can feel like a new person. #MAC #lipstick #beauty https://t.co/QOqgTynOEO
2/27
2015
I could read War and Peace in the time it takes my kids to eat dinner.Girl Scout cookie serving size: one sleeve.
2/25
2015
7 degrees out, so the school bus will inevitably be late. I wish you really *could* freeze your ass off. Great spring fitness plan!It is -12 outside. My neighbor is wearing a pair of shorts and sandals to take his dog out. That's a hardcore New Englander for ya. Sheesh!Having "The Talk" With My Five-Year-Old http://t.co/h2HSZFXr54 via @Maisy_F
2/24
2015
#parenting http://t.co/h2HSZGf1WC
2/23
2015
@sara71081 I went with the zombies, but am back with the glam now. It's nice to switch from decomposing bodies with botoxed ones.@moms_random We must have the same designer! #runwayready@Maisy_F Oscars! I'm all decked out in my best tshirt and yoga pants and I even have some spit up accents on my shoulder. #bestdressed
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezWhat are you watching tonight: The Walking Dead or the Oscars?@LizA_from_LA Me too. Fascinating and depressing. I have a love/hate relationship with that show.@LizA_from_LA Have you seen the one with all the dead cats stored in the fridge and freezer? Horror show!The Biggest of Virtual Hugs http://t.co/f9Xm5qpmZj
2/22
2015
Letting my kids dress me for a week taught me a few things. http://t.co/uCSSLvwpan via @Maisy_F #styleIf eating my body weight in mango curry is wrong, I don't want to be right.
2/21
2015
If you've ever said the phrase "Hey. Potatoes aren't supposed to fly," You might be a mom
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezSweat pants, a bottle of wine and four baskets of laundry to fold. #FridayNight #livingthedream@sara71081 @ChewingCrayons ha! I know. This week has been an inspiration to try as hard as they did to choose better outfits for myself.Five things I learned from letting my children dress me. http://t.co/uCSSLvO01V #style #childstylists #lessons@ChewingCrayons thanks for the RT! :) I'm at the mall in today's outfit. My 2 yo did me proud today!@Maisy_F @ChewingCrayons I've seen worse... Example: when I dress myself.
Retweeted by Maisy Fernandez
2/20
2015
I let my kids dress me this week. Today was pretty awful. http://t.co/s7uptVdaLY
2/19
2015
Putting on lipstick with numb lip after dentist = hot mess.Sitting in dentist chair. #terror #thestruggleisreal
2/18
2015
Child Stylists, Day Three: The Blues #childstylists #fashion #style #kids #parenting http://t.co/5xP8sZaNdk
2/17
2015
Child Stylists, Day Two: Color Burst http://t.co/7CsbaDCdyrPoor Chris. This is the worst thing I've ever heard. #TheBachelorUgh. Turn down the mics. Nobody wants to hear all that lip smacking so loud. #TheBachelorRobert Kirkman says #WalkingDead spinoff will be 'startlingly different': http://t.co/1qYgKHpjfD http://t.co/OaKBvWjgK5
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezBelieve it or not, I got the idea for these cute bear pancakes from Snoop Dogg's Instagram. #funmealshttp://t.co/D0WGxKOOwAMy son just read my daughter 2 books in bed. They have already realized their full daily allotment for getting along. Gonna be a long day.
2/16
2015
Not for nothin', but there's a reason Jack Nicholson went bonkers in The Shining. #Boston #blizzardville
2/15
2015
Another #blizzard, another important decision to make in the basement. #newenglandwinterhttp://t.co/MG9bH1oi20The V-day entry from the Shakespeare insult calendar. #Shakespeare #valentinesday #kisses http://t.co/pZe0loz6eF
2/14
2015
I have a dentist appointment next Wednesday. Is it too early to start crying in the bathroom with the door locked?Aw, how sweet--my kids are playing a board game together! I can tell by the arguing, accusations, and clicking of die being thrown at walls.
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezGulping coffee like a college kid chugs a beer.
2/13
2015
Fifty Shades of Shut the Hell Up. I am so tired of hearing about this book/movie.Our Plan For February Vacation: Toddler Stylists http://t.co/fjyXNTMOZC
2/12
2015
A good way to gauge how well things went with the babysitter is to see how swiftly they rush to the front door when you get home.Look At Me, Damn It #TwitterIn5Words
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezMy favorite Stevie Wonder song! Starbucks is killing in in the music department today. #amwritingWorking from home can be isolating. Having coffee and enjoying funk and R&B tunes at @Starbucks solves that. #hellzyeah #amwriting
2/11
2015
This Boston winter renders me incapable of talking about anything but snow. But I look pretty young for suddenly being 90, right?
2/10
2015
I love how he just leaves their asses in the Badlands and takes off in the helicopter. #TheBachelorYou guys, that was just Ashley's makeup suitcase #TheBachelor
Retweeted by Maisy Fernandez"How many kids do you want?" "As many as works. Like, literally. As many as we can make work on the farm." #thebachelor
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezThe Greatest Day of My Life, So Far http://t.co/bWdKszhbvc via @ponymartini Awesome post! #parentingAnother snow day, another day of Bailey's in my coffee. #parentingMass. Gov. Baker said state crews have removed enough snow to fill @GilletteStadium 90 times: http://t.co/THFdGDLCuI
Retweeted by Maisy Fernandez
2/9
2015
For every 35 things I clean up off the floor, 100 more appear. #parenting #thestruggleisrealI am so excited about @WalkingDead_AMC's return tonight that I didn't get enough sleep and feel like a total zombie. That's dedication!
2/8
2015
@mollytopia You're welcome! Glad to have found your blog.Catching up on the new season of #Shameless. Love this show.7 Truths That Make Parenting More Fun http://t.co/N5F2E1xiF2 via @mollytopia A joy to read and great reminders. #parentingGetting my butt handed to me in a cut throat game of Go Fish. This kid is a card shark.You Never Know What You Have Until It's Gone. http://t.co/nbndSCbjbQ #hotshowers #glasses
2/7
2015
An elderly man takes his elderly dog out for a ride every day. I want to hug both of them. http://t.co/12j7q1DSey
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezPreschooler eating her cupcake frosting side first instead of sideways. Wise beyond her years.A hush falls over the house as the kids lick the beaters we just used to make cupcakes, and I weep with joy. Silence > everything.@mallelis Quiet neighbors!There are many things I wish would come parachuting to me from the sky. A canister of oats isn't high on that list. #quakercommercial
2/6
2015
It's incredible to think that living with the ridiculous #Kardashian Klatch was probably the least of Bruce Jenner's concerns.More snow. Because the 40+ inches we got in the past 10 days isn't enough. Old Man Winter needs a Valium. #aintnobodygottimefordatJust did 45 minutes of cardio looking for my 2-year-old's glasses. Didn't find 'em. Are they partying somewhere with all the missing socks?
2/5
2015
The Real Housewives Ain't Got Nothin' on This! http://t.co/YAtDBhibv7 via @Maisy_FI'm going to donate these clothes I don't wear anymore to charity after I drive them around in the trunk of my car for eight months.
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezParenting fact No. 348: The school bus will never be on time when you're standing outside and it's 4 degrees.I will be unavailable for the next hour, as my 2 yo and I will be *crushing it* at the library's preschool dance party.
2/4
2015
I kind of thought the whole story of Frozen was a bunch of crap until I moved to MA. http://t.co/NSwtEhcn9eMe: How’s it going? 2-year-old: I DIDN’T PUT LEGOS IN THE POTTY! Something tells me there are Legos in the potty.
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezThe momentary silence comes courtesy of the after-school snacks. Best 3 minutes of the day.5 Tips to Taking Great Instagram Photos #photos #photography http://t.co/lY1ik65U8U
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezNew Starbucks drink idea: The Ralph Macchiato - It tastes like a cream puff but has a surprising kick at the end.
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezTwo hour snow delay offers plenty of time for a WWE match over Chutes & Ladders. Now, where is that Kahlua for my coffee?
2/3
2015
Kelsey is a school counselor. Let that soak in for a bit. #TheBachelor
Retweeted by Maisy Fernandez"I was nervous...and I don't think the wine helped." Ah. Now I remember Jordan. #thebachelor
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezThis reaches a new low in awkwardness on #TheBachelor
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezI never visited Alaska because ... too much snow. Then I moved to New England.For every retweet @PedigreeUS will donate a bowl of food to a shelter dog! #TweetForBowls http://t.co/FelzrRI3WG
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezSo appropriate for yet another snowstorm day. #shakespeareinsultcalendar #newenglandwinter #Shakespeare http://t.co/ukPwmUk0E6Oh shit, not again. #WorstDayIn4Words #newenglandwinter http://t.co/rviQX951jzIf I have 8 minutes to myself I'm not spending it on my abs.
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezMe: I'm going to the restroom, I'll be right back. 2 year old: Can I sit on your lap? #parenting
2/2
2015
If @DwyaneWade is out for the All-Star game, @KyleDraperTV & @SherrodbCSN tell you who should replace him. #Celtics Pregame Live at 12:30
Retweeted by Maisy Fernandez
2/1
2015
Retweet for the @Seahawks and the city of Seattle! (What a photo!) #GMASuperBowl #SB49 #12s [PHOTO/@equalmotion] http://t.co/R192l9zx03
Retweeted by Maisy FernandezHighway to the moon Photo by Aaron J. Groen http://t.co/ZUogQbgyWa
Retweeted by Maisy Fernandez“@ChewingCrayons: Had the flu last week We're better now, but we had to assassinate a mattress: https://t.co/5ZeOYjZj1O” #parenting #humor@amberfarman Hi Amber! Thanks so much. I look forward to reading it!At the library doing research for work. Peace and quiet, plus the smell of books. Doesn't get much better than that. #serenitynow
1/31
2015
Is it bedtime yet?! Too much crazy up in here. #wineoclock@DavidSavio11 good luck to you, too! Enjoy the game!@LennyKravitz just said on ESPN he's rooting for the @Seahawks. Knew I loved him for a reason! #SB49 #nflHad to get 2 bday presents today with 2yo in tow. Two hours later, we emerged from Toys R Us. #exhaustedRus #pleasesendcoffeeIf you ever feel dumb, remember sometimes sloths grab their own arms thinking they are tree branches and fall to the ground.
Retweeted by Maisy Fernandez@TaterTotsMom So cute, Nina! Nick is decked out for the Patriots today, too.
1/30
2015
@DavidSavio11 Yep, then you know the pain. Tough crowd out there!Just a #Seahawks fan living in Boston. NBD. #SB49 http://t.co/jKCNTIaKb9
1/29
2015
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